That's My Ex, Get Your Own!
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
Scenario: My friend is trying to hook up with my ex, she told me they've already went out a few times. I was with him for 4 years until he cheated and broke my heart. She was there for me through it all and I can't believe she would do this to me! What kind of friend is that?
Response: The kind of friend that is, is one that cannot be trusted! We all know there is an unwritten rule amongst friends: The ex is off limits! We should not go after someone a friend was previously involved with. It can lead to so much unnecessary drama. People need to think about whether it is worth risking friendship to pursue a relationship that may not even last.
Another point is that your friend was wrong to date your ex without even discussing it with you before hand. If she was going to break the friend code she should have at least had the respect to give you a heads up and get your input. Your feelings were not considered in this situation. She knew how badly you were hurt by this guy and to choose to date a known cheater over maintaining a friendship is simply foolish.
You need to decide if this is the type of friend you really need in your life. If you decide to keep the friendship going, you may want to keep a close eye on her intentions in the future. Most likely you will always have a trust issue with her from this point on. When your next boyfriend comes along, you will always wonder if she likes him more than she should or if she will go after him as well.
I personally feel that someone with such disregard for your feelings is not a true friend. If I were in your situation, I would consider this person a waste of space in my friend circle. I prefer to cut drama out off as soon as I see the sign that it is on the way and in your situation there is definitely potential for drama. However, everyone feels differently. So if you decide to continue with this person if your life, take my advice and keep your eyes wide open until she earns your trust back.
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Response: The kind of friend that is, is one that cannot be trusted! We all know there is an unwritten rule amongst friends: The ex is off limits! We should not go after someone a friend was previously involved with. It can lead to so much unnecessary drama. People need to think about whether it is worth risking friendship to pursue a relationship that may not even last.
Another point is that your friend was wrong to date your ex without even discussing it with you before hand. If she was going to break the friend code she should have at least had the respect to give you a heads up and get your input. Your feelings were not considered in this situation. She knew how badly you were hurt by this guy and to choose to date a known cheater over maintaining a friendship is simply foolish.
You need to decide if this is the type of friend you really need in your life. If you decide to keep the friendship going, you may want to keep a close eye on her intentions in the future. Most likely you will always have a trust issue with her from this point on. When your next boyfriend comes along, you will always wonder if she likes him more than she should or if she will go after him as well.
I personally feel that someone with such disregard for your feelings is not a true friend. If I were in your situation, I would consider this person a waste of space in my friend circle. I prefer to cut drama out off as soon as I see the sign that it is on the way and in your situation there is definitely potential for drama. However, everyone feels differently. So if you decide to continue with this person if your life, take my advice and keep your eyes wide open until she earns your trust back.