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Get Off My Sofa!  

Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Scenario: My little brother has been staying with me since he got kicked out of his girlfriend's apartment a few months ago. He's driving me nuts! I want him out but I don't want to be a bad sister. What would you do?

Response: Let me start by saying that in no way would you be a bad sister for wanting your brother to move out of your home. It shows that you are a loving sister for the mere fact that you allowed him to stay there at all! I feel for you, we all love our personal space!

If you did not establish a general length of stay from the start, now is the time to address the issue. Decide how much longer you can handle him being there before he completely drives you up the wall. Also, try to think of how much time he realistically needs to get a place of his own or find an alternative living situation.

If he is paying rent or utilities while he is staying with you, you may want to nix that so he saves his money to get out of your hair even sooner! Once you have a deadline in place, make it clear to him that you mean business. Let him know you will help as much as you can but you have your own responsibilities to take care of.

Again, wanting your brother out and setting demands does not make you a bad sister. The fact that you are siblings does not mean you are responsible for each other. It does not require you to take care of him or give him the right to live off of you. Try to hang in there and make sure you set those goals to avoid any damage to your relationship on account of driving each other crazy under one roof!
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